Queer Uncuriosity

22 Jan, 2025

I have, in the past, already complained about the constant erasure of intersex people in the queer community; from people misusing the word to mean something completely different, to people who only aknowledge us when it's convenient for them, it's such a constant that I'm fairly certain it's one of the first posts I ever made on thsi blog.

Well guess what! I'm going to do it again! In the dubious honor of that "LGBT for dummies" zine I read which listed multiple nuances in sexualitis & genders but couldn't be bothered to so much as mention us, I'm allowing myself to make the same post twice: the queer community constantly erase us, and it is Fucking Tiring. If I visit a shop that sells queer merch, they probably won't have any intersex merch. If I see some educational queer zine or post, it's probably not going to include intersex people (no, seriously, I've ran into like 3 different zines listing off important dates for trans rights and gay rights and not a single thing about us, despite the fact that trans history & intersex history are intimately tied.) I go on the intersex tag on a social media, or, god forbid, on amazon or somewhere thats sells shit? Here, I'll give you a glimpse of what's it like:

• futa porn
• "Remember regardless of your gender or sexuality you are VALID!" [does not mention intersex people anywhere]
• extremely common misconception that could be cleared up by spending 10 seconds on wikipedia
• mpreg porn
• "hey guys don't you think intersex people are so fascinating? They're such a subject of wonder. They're so exotic and strange and different. They're nature's fun little experiments. No I'm not dehumanizing them haha I'm just really fascinated by them."
• "omg intersex people are biologically non-binary"/"nb intersex people are basically cis"
• "Cis people get gender affirming surgery so easily and they they get on trans people's ass for wanting those same surgery" [does not mention the EXTENSIVE history of intersex medicalisation and how those gender affirming surgeries are often coerced if not outright nonconsentual]
• radfems
• "You guys need to stop saying that [variation on sexual development that is heavily medicalised and stygmatized] is an intersex condition omg that's insulting to compare people to these freaks"
• "Why are intersex people so crude about their trauma all the time? We'd listen to you guys more if you didn't sound so angry"

And the bit that kills me is that... intersex people are literally in the fucking queer acronym. We're the "I" in LGBTQIA+". Do people not look up what these letters mean? I remember when i first learned about queer shit as a kid, I went on a big wikipedia dive trying to understand what all this shit meant. Granted, it was a different time- I didn't even know what "transgender" meant, for instance- but like. Aren't you guys curious? Not even a little bit? About your peers, about other humans in this world?

More than once, I've gone in the intersex tag, and seen someone say something along the lines of "LMAO cis people are so dumb thinking there are only two genders." Tagged as intersex. No mention of intersex people. A post I can only read as "this person thinks intersex = non binary."

Yeah, cishetallos can be fucking embarrassing in their ignorance. But who are you, to think you are any better? You, who are using words you clearly didn't google up even once?

People love to use the term "queer community." Community. Well, maybe you should start by actually getting interested in the labels people other than you use & the human rights your people are actually fighting for. I don't fucking know my man. I don't know how to explain that you should care for other people because they're people, not because they're like you. Look up that fucking acronym. Read the wikipedia page at least I am fucking begging.